Category: Nostalgic musings

VERSE | HAPPY BIRTHDAY DEAREST ONE 🌺

On By Mahvash K. M.In Nostalgic musings, poetry, verse, writingLeave a comment 
There is a little photograph 
That sits upon my shelf 
In its monochromatic hues it holds
My world in its sweet self 

A vision sits inside the frame 
A smile lights up her face 
She’s looking out from beaming eyes 
In another time and place 

Even as I look at her 
She reaches inside my heart 
Pulling at blue-purple strings 
Of memories tender and soft

I can almost feel the comforting 
Gentleness of her hand
It lies there like a lilly 
On the railing where she stands 

I wish sometimes for magic 
An alchemy of the souls 
for a few quicksilver moments 
Your beautiful hands to hold 

Then I close my eyes and reach 
For your vital warmth once more 
I’m wrapped up in nostalgia 
For times and places from before 

Your photo sits on my shelf, Mama 
It’s full of your love and grace
On most days I just reach within 
And you hold me in your loving embrace.

VERSE|The Severance

On By Mahvash K. M.In alphabet soup for the soul, Nostalgic musings, poetry, truth, verseLeave a comment 
I should have seen it coming ... I felt it coming.
The personal angst, both sitting with their own.
The self-deprecation; the momentary loathing; the struggle to dignify; the failure to clarify - 
The ever-triumphant Status Quo!

He speaks; he accuses; he rails and he rants; 
He threatens; he shouts; he’s shaking - he’s livid.

I recoil in disbelief; something sinks beyond the grasp of our shared togetherness.  
I watch him before me, as I watch us within me,
Sink....   sink........    drown.

I feel the cold sweat break out, but I don’t feel my hands or my feet.
I feel my heart thumping against my chest, but I don’t feel the warmth of the blood gushing through me.
I dissociate; I levitate.....

I see a woman.

She sits there transfixed, pupils dilated...
Then something snaps - 
She speaks; she explains; she questions and she battles; 
She shouts, her voice hoarse with tears of frustration.

She diminishes; she’s silent.

She’s broken.

She should have seen it coming - the end of the line.
She just didn’t see it coming.

VERSE|Thank you for the Joy

On By Mahvash K. M.In alphabet soup for the soul, Joy, Nostalgic musings, poetry, verse4 Comments

They say the creative types produce their best work while in the throes of incredible happiness, or while in the savage, unrelenting grip of immense anguish. Much like the perpetually conflicted Michaelangelo, who while being devoutly catholic was also inimitably homosexual. The constant inner conflict arguably served to inspire his best work, lesser known of which is the “Prisoners” series of sculptures.

And so (on a much more modest scale!) the below came about while I experienced an extraordinary time of tremendous joy 2 years post my mother’s passing away after a protracted and distressing illness. I share this heretofore very private memorialization in the hope that it may bring a few moments of comfort to folks going through something similar.

THANK YOU FOR THE JOY

I saw you in a dream a few nights ago
I had your gold bangle on - the one you always wore
And I felt you near me
I closed my eyes - so afraid I’d lose the thread.....


And then I felt my heart beat fast
As I felt you closer still,
Eyes closed, I whirled around the room
And then I felt my hand grasped lightly 
And I held my breath, Mama
And I whirled with joy - I whirled and whirled
And then YOU held my other hand
And you were there! And you laughed!
And I laughed! And I held on to your beautiful hands
As we whirled together in joy and laughter!


You were well, and you were happy - and you came to me;
In your infinite compassion, wisdom and love - you came to me.


I tear up as I write this not because I grieve this time,
But because I’m overwhelmed; I’m overcome with knowing you’re healed and happy,
And that i danced with you in extraordinary bliss.


I ask just one thing of you today Momsy,
For us to grieve a little less and to celebrate you so much more
Just once, every year, let me and the girls dance with you in joy.


Until we meet again Mama.