They say the creative types produce their best work while in the throes of incredible happiness, or while in the savage, unrelenting grip of immense anguish. Much like the perpetually conflicted Michaelangelo, who while being devoutly catholic was also inimitably homosexual. The constant inner conflict arguably served to inspire his best work, lesser known of which is the “Prisoners” series of sculptures.
And so (on a much more modest scale!) the below came about while I experienced an extraordinary time of tremendous joy 2 years post my mother’s passing away after a protracted and distressing illness. I share this heretofore very private memorialization in the hope that it may bring a few moments of comfort to folks going through something similar.
THANK YOU FOR THE JOY
I saw you in a dream a few nights ago
I had your gold bangle on - the one you always wore
And i felt you near me
I closed my eyes - so afraid I’d lose the thread.....
And then i felt my heart beat fast
As I felt you closer still,
Eyes closed, i whirled around the room
And then i felt my hand grasped lightly
And i held my breath, Mama
And i whirled with joy - i whirled and whirled
And then YOU held my other hand
And you were there! And you laughed!
And i laughed! And i held on to your beautiful hands
As we whirled together in joy and laughter!
You were well, and you were happy - and you came to me;
In your infinite compassion, wisdom and love - you came to me.
I tear up as I write this not because i grieve this time,
But because I’m overwhelmed; I’m overcome with knowing you’re healed and happy,
And that i danced with you in extraordinary bliss.
I ask just one thing of you today Momsy,
For us to grieve a little less and to celebrate you so much more
Just once, every year, let me and the girls dance with you in joy.
Until we meet again Mama.