Rap this if you’re feeling especially bold and rhythmical today 👩‍🎤🎶🎤

‘Did you hear the news today?’
A friend asked avidly  
Like a magician about to pull
A rabbit from his brolly

Scratch that, it’s actually a hat 
Poetic license at play 
But let me get back to the topic at hand: 
What he was about to say  

I looked at him expectantly 
My facial muscles tense
I had to look the part you see:
Eyes wide in burning suspense 

He was about to share the stuff 
Of top notch gossip rags 
My left eye twitched; I wish he’d just let  
The Infernal cat out of the bag 

It’s not that I’m averse to all
The spice of life a-brewing 
Some days .. well, actually most 
I’m just happier not knowing. 

‘Did You know’ he finally said
‘That we’re all figmental beings
Of someone’s mad imaginings 
The Covid and even us yuman beans’

I looked at him, blinked in surprise 
Then laughed a merry laugh 
At least it wasn’t about the politico
Who looked startlingly like a giraffe. 

‘That thought has passed my mind’ 
I said, conversationally 
‘Lattice Quantum Chromodynamics
And the matrix anomalies’ 

News that wasn’t “news” deserved 
obscurely fab theories
Fuzzy heads and tails and all
I thought, to keep it company. 

He looked at me with great disdain
‘What’s your frickin’ deal?
Just call it what it really is 
We’re hamsters in a wheel!’

‘We’re hamsters in a wheel!’ I sang 
‘We’re chasing our own tails 
Creating our little purgatories 
We’re chasing our own tales!’

And so I heard the news that day 
And it had made me grin 
The universe too doesn’t mind a few
Light jabs every now and then.